Forum Poetry Jests

[ElephantHunter]

Here's my submission
(Any poetry will do)
a rhyming haiku:

Devastating five!
Chakra fists multiple times
Caught MM surprised

[Kazuki]

That does not rhyme

Yes, it does, and your post is too insignificant to exist.

I thought it was quite clever. Looking forward to anyone who can top that in terms of comedy.

[Blue-ninja]

I thought haikus were supposed to be centered. Eh, never mind. It doesn't matter, does it?

Food is good for you
Potatoes taste good with cheese
Boogers are salty

[Lord Frunkamunch]

When writing haiku
try to connect it somehow
random thoughts get old

There once was a man from Pripyat
Who couldn't stop playing Soldat
He played day and night
Till his skin got so white
He blinded people when looked at.

[ds dude]

I'm not sure if I'm good at poetry.

See the star shining bright.
That I went to see.
It looked at me so fondly.
I knew it was meant for me.

I don't know, I'm not sure if it suppose to rhyme a lot.

[echo_trail]

I wrote this some years ago when I was quite far out and my life was a mess. Don't know if it's really poetry, but I'll add it. I was never any good at this anyway.

another sniff, another draw
another spliff, you're wanting more
emotionally wrecked
basic instinct takes effect
you know it all, but not a thing
this psychic brawl, so consuming

turnin' eyes, praying please
no one's there your pain to ease
so how you lose, it comes so vast
there are only these, ghosts of the past
you welcome them, arms wide open
can't fight it, might as well hold'em

no now, no future, no hope
Who cares, you're not wanting it anyway..

[Chakra]

Some quick/shit haikus with a small element of truth to 'em. Hooya!


Women drive me crazy.
You want me now i'm taken?
Really, what the fuck.

Sorry for last night.
I didn't mean to pass wind
The moment I came.

I love how you eat
Sticky pancakes with your hands.
Makes cooking worth while.

My hoover caught fire.
Parts off Ebay should arrive.
Sha'nt hoover fish 'gain.

Should be working now,
Instead of posting crap here.
Far too much to do.

[SadistAtHeart]

Backflips from the flat
Tossing the molotovs high
We destroy our world

[Horve]

"Bloody Birthday"

This is the day of silence
not just an ordinary day
corpses slashed and sliced
lying naked in the way
streets soaked red in blood
three bodies twitching on the floor
knee-deep sticky flood
oozing into houses through open doors

Worse and sicker than warfare
walks a man the streets today
replacing reality with nightmares
cutting up everything in his way
women and children chopped to pieces
dismembered men swinging on hooks
intestines rotting in human feces
dead dried up eyes exchanging looks

concrete houses echo in lonesome laughter
in the center of surrounding slaughter
causing the living's eyes to water
hunting down civilians is all that matters
for this is the day of Jasper
who received no presents from his friends
anger and rage crushing his temper
cutting his comrades to painful death

Jasper, Happy birthday you motherfucker
right before you became postal
forgot to look under the bed you sucker
because of you there is no more Bristol
fortunately it was just a daydream
and the sky is free from silent screams
let the warm sunshine beams
warm your skin and heart again
for today is your birthday
Hooray!

[Chakra]

Wheres the jest?