It's a good try but the resolution isnt the best in my opinion . Furthermore , you should add some story line ,
For example :
2012 , A new star was born . ACTIONS . That star is named chox . ACTIONS . He comes from Poland . ACTIONS.
Well , you get what i mean . Also we can't see on the video who you killed , so yeah we need to see that. Try to add more effects too!
Well Good Job for your first video!! continue like that and just try to improve with the criticism!