Pressure moment

[Blacksheepboy]

Sorry, I'm having a pressure moment right now that involves questioning my life as it now is--my actions and.. kind of everything regarding what I do; my success and motivations with people, etc. Maybe somebody will tell me to just shut up (or even validate anything comprehensible) after this upcoming word-fest describing my synonyms for what might be procrastination:

So it comes down to just basically trying your best in every situation that you find yourself in. No more relaxed easing back. Oh geeze. No more skimming, amusement, me-ism rants... stepping back and checking things out and loling about them. No more warmth and self-gratification from "chilling out." No more going away to figure things out... No more stepping back and observing with a smiling face. No more self-pleasing and entertainment. No more waiting and, "I could always do this better later--just wait for the day, it will come once everyone understands (not me, just understands..." Uuuuh oh my. Hm. "Excellence could always be achieved later when there's more at stake/it really matters." "I can always make sense of myself whenever, at any time if need be." Eh

"Procrastination" means nothing to me -- that word is like a big scary void in which could be any action if not properly defined.

It's like a deep pressure 'soul' moment..

[SoldatFire]

Sure... i go play soldat

[PQ]

Why would you want to be successful? It's way easier to succeed if you want to be moderate!

Do you know how stupid most people are!?
Way to go! Just sit back, relax, you are way too smart to be moderate if you're trying to succeed!   

[Blacksheepboy]

I totally enjoyed your comment PQ.

If ever you desire to educate yourself, seriously think first! Most knowledge is a curse |:<, and I am totally not saying this to compliment myself--as if I have lots of knowledge, lol

[Mangled*]

It is better to be a human being dissatisfied than a pig satisfied; better to be Socrates dissatisfied than a fool satisfied.

Life is an opportunity to exist, experience and learn. I pity any fool who believes that human society is the way society is meant to be, any fool who believes that they were born to have a job and to spend their life working, that paying bills and taxes is a natural phenomenon.

Nevertheless that is the society built by our ancestors and you are stuck with it. Oil deposits are not the property of the Earth or the human population, they are the property of the land baron that got there first. Fresh water is bottled and sold to consumers to drink. We have divided up every inch of land in the name of profit and personal enterprise. Ambition is fine so long as you don't have a skewed perception of the universe.

Find something you love and do it. If you're doing something you don't ultimately like then don't do it. You only live once, so make it a blinder.

[Blacksheepboy]

My appreciation is abundant, yet I don't wish to flatter you with it. (which sounds bad, but I mean flattery in it's offensive, original sort of form)

[{LAW} Gamer_2k4]

What you're saying is common sense; anyone, even if they don't want to admit it, knows that there's no other way to excel (or even progress) except by buckling down and getting to work.  However, don't tell us about it; just do it.  There's no need to make up a big speech, or get psyched up, or any of that.  That's for useless motivational speakers and self-help books.  If you really want to change, just change.

"Excellence could always be achieved later when there's more at stake/it really matters." "I can always make sense of myself whenever, at any time if need be."

Take it from me, that sentiment is proof that you're stuck.  "Of course I can change...just not now.  But if I WANTED to, man, it'd be done in an instant."  If that was true, the problem wouldn't be there, because you would've changed already.  The fact that you're trying to convince yourself that you can means that you can't.  You try, you fail, so you tell yourself that you weren't really trying.

Again, if you want to change, just do it.  I know firsthand that if you strip away all the talking and the "I should"s and the "if only"s, you can accomplish a lot.  Three years ago I decided to start writing.  Now I've written 130,000 words in 22 chapters.  Two years ago I decided I'd try out judo.  Now I'm a brown belt.  A year ago I chose to pick up piano.  Now I'm blowing through the lesson books.  Three months ago I wanted to lose weight.  Now I'm down 30 pounds.  I didn't make a big deal about those things.  I just went out and did them.

In my mind, the best way to ensure success is to do things only for yourself.  That way, you won't be tempted to fudge success for the sake of looking good.  You won't try to find shortcuts, and you'll make fewer excuses.  The only person you're accountable to is yourself, and there's no fooling him.

So, get some goals (something notably lacking in your post), and go out and achieve them! Don't tell us when you're starting; tell us when you're finished.

[Blacksheepboy]

These are things regarding seeming self-sacrifices, relationships with people (especially family, such as my mother and sisters), and other daily sacrifices where steadiness rather than fervor is ideal (because fervor burns out whereas steadiness.. generally endures).

It's being successful that bites. Success is.. fairly easy in and of itself. I could pick up something, some jokes or whatever, practice them to my heart's content, and then be funny, blah, blah etc., and that's success, but it's superfluous and... not part of my "mission" in life. I could get a job, and yet get nowhere in life--nowhere closer to where I am headed, and want to go. But, yeah, success sucks because it's often self-defeating. Subtle, steady success is the b***hiest, and of course, most ideal.


You see, I am sick of pampering myself in those subtle.. "I could but I won't"s, or "I probably shouldn't but I will anyway, it's 'not that detrimental'". It.. leads nowhere profitable. It just does not dispose me to anything good--greater relationships, better social effectiveness and success.. etc. I am not stuck--only just.. recognizing faults within myself that aggravate me because it's one of those things that takes a complete lifestyle to perfect, and I'm far from the ideal lifestyle, and far from necessarily wanting it. I do, for its benefits; I don't, for its sacrifices.

In my mind, the best way to ensure success is to do things only for yourself.

And that's where things are different.. to be there, with people attuning yourself to every situation according to what is best for the other, and most suitable.. to be "all things to all people" (and reading that quote gives me a 'I just got punched in the gut' feeling, because it isn't.. easy). It takes a lifetime, and a lifestyle mainly.

It's like having the capacity to be the qualities of all four of "The Four Temperaments" whenever any one of them is called for, respectively, and regardless of whether or not you feel so inclined, to the point where, eventually your feelings will come in line with what you must do (which would be doing the right thing). Feelings are a very tricky one--there's a lot involved.

Basically, my career is people. They are the sole component of my 'mission,' which is vast and requires very many skills, and virtues (describing the category of 'virtues' is no easy task.. I mean something other than that it sounds like).

tl;dr
Eh, I dunno, for some people, it seems like this stuff comes easy to them. [shrug]. I guess they must either have that "lifestyle," or they just come from a great family or something

[{LAW} Gamer_2k4]

I'm not sure I follow you.  Is your goal to understand the human mind and condition? If so, good freaking luck; people have been trying that for thousands of years.  The thing that makes us human, the thing that separates us from machines, is irrationality.  Emotions can be boiled down to "feelings that exist in spite of logic."

Is your goal to simply be the master of personalities, to put on any face as the situation warrants? If so, that's a good deal easier.  It's called acting, and there are people who make careers out of it.  If, instead, you're referring to legitimately feeling whatever you're "supposed" to feel, give it up right now.  It's impossible.  You cannot be "all things to all people."  Everyone is different.  Everyone has different expectations, emotions, standards, morals, and so on.  At some point, those things are going to conflict.  You can't be "all things to all people" any more than an object can be entirely black and white at the same time.  And if your interpretation is to be black on one side and white on the other, that's just acting again: presenting different false realities to different people.

Of course, all this is just babbling in the wind.  I'm trying to answer what I think you're saying, rather than what you actually are.  So, what IS your goal?

[Mangled*]

I know where you're coming from Blacksheep, throw me a pm.

[homerofgods]

You sound like me when I watch DeathNote. I want to become a God

Or when I have played Ultima IX:
Honesty, Compassion, Valor, Justice, Sacrifice, Honor, Spirituality, and Humility. These Eight Virtues are based on the Three Principles of Truth, Love, and Courage. The Principles are derived from the One True Axiom, the combination of all Truth, all Love, and all Courage, which is Infinity.

Put down some goals on a list of priorities, and start doing them

[demoniac93]

Eh, I just think, and therefore I am.
No need to be contemplating the future.

[Tibneo]

I think you're really underestimating the power of procrastination...

PROCRASTINATORS UNITE! ... tomorrow...

[Snow]

I wrote the following pretty much as a response to your first sentence of this thread. I feel the following is an appropriate response and advice even though it seems off topic of what you posted about. In short I think you're simply suffering from worrying.

Honestly... there is no answer. When I was younger.. about late teens to early 20's, I always felt like I was missing not just the boat... but the "party" boat every single day. I suffered from "if I don't do *SOMETHING* now, I'm going to lose out and become some loser that I'm not, while everyone else is hip, with it, having fun and finding their places". It's too bad that anyone goes through that. The fact of the matter is, is that life changes and no matter what you think or how much you convince yourself that who you are NOW is who you stay, life changes you and you WILL change. You will end up valuing different things 10 years from now than you do right now. (Except for Soldat, you had better be on these forums and in game in 10 years.)

There was a book I read once about how not to worry.. aptly named "How Not to Worry". I believe the author wrote it in the 1920's. He wrote it after what happened to him and how he almost died. He was a salesman of some sort living in a big city (NY perhaps), he was in debt.. there were other problems, etc. He ended up worrying every day. He worried about money, crappy job/performance, about his past, about "missing the boat".. He started having trouble eating and finally ended up in the hospital. Docs said he was sick with something bad, his body was shutting down and he had a month or so to live. After the shock wore off, he said "fuck it all". He didn't care about his worries anymore, since it was all over, so he goes down to the coast and goes on a cruise (or whatever they had in the 20's). He was on a saline diet and docs told him to eat little as otherwise would only make him sicker. Again he said "fuck it, I'll eat what I want.. gonna die anyway". A month passes by and to his surprise, he's healthier. Another 2 months pass by (I believe he was on the boat for 6 months total) and he's almost completely healthy. He realized that it was his worrying that had made him sick.. it was literally killing him. Those months he spent on the boat were the happiest months of his life. When he was declared "near dead", he gave up all his worries.

To get to the point.. I read most of the book, but stopped, since there was one short paragraph that he repeated through out the book that sums up the whole thing... it was something like this: "Don't worry (or it's foolish to worry) about the past as it has already happened. Don't worry about tomorrow as it hasn't happened yet and thus you have NO control over what might happen. Only change what you can TODAY. Simply.. make the best of your time." Something along those lines.. but that was it.

If you've been lazy and procrastinating in the past... 1. you can't change that, but 2. .. who cares. If you feel like your missing the boat - that means that basically you're worrying about tomorrow.. so forget it. For all you know.. that proverbial boat might sink as in what ever it is you're missing out on.. might change and become undesirable. Just simply make the best of your time each day. If you have a skill or talent, practice it. Clean up your room or your living area (house). Ask that girl out that you've been eying - worst that can happen is a "no". etc etc.

Life is truly best if you live it day by day. I'm 33 at the moment and my life is not at all what I expected to be living. It's still a mystery. I just finished a course in programming and looking for work. I've never worked as a programmer before so I don't know how it will be. I might hate it and end up going back to the drawing board to try something else.. or I might love it and become moderately successful. Bottom line is, at the moment, I am happy. I'm not doing my best at the moment as it's not needed. I'm just doing what I need to. I'm just simply happy with who I am. I'm happy that I know my potential, even though I'm not living or working at my full potential. I'm happy that I'm healthy and that I'm 99.9999% sure that I'll be playing Soldat tomorrow.

[numgun]

Sure... i go play soldat

Hahah, this post made my day. : D

Wish I was as free-minded as you right now, but once you realize you have limited time to achieve your dreams in life and also enjoy them, your mind gets a bit tense and too busy to be able to feel free like that.

[PQ]

You guys care about yourself way too much.
People in modern society are just comparing their own life with their role model, no matter how happy they are. All you get is trouble.
1/20 people in the Netherlands use antidepressant. That's a LOT! Just because they're feeling 'down', where is the our 'everyone has a bad day once in a while' mentality. Stop whining about your 'no goal in life' and 'I don't feel happy' just think happy, take the bus somewhere unknown and surprise yourself.
Your life is what you do with it. Just live life, you'll die anyway, no matter how successful you've been. Life is about yourself, not about others. Happiness is about yourself, successfulness is not. Can't you just say you've succeed if you're a happy man?
So just do something weird.

protip: call some random number, if he/she starts talking ans says his/her name. Start google'ing that name and start a nice convo as in you've met each other in a bar some time ago.  

[Stuffy]

I dont know how you guys can write something like that into the internet, I mean its the INTERNET. I would be scared of losing all my privacy. Same with all the facebook stuff.
I guess some people just dont get how easy it is to find somebody via google or other searchengines.

I've once read a book about the transparent society. First, everythings fine, the world becomes more peaceful because everyone is sharing his problems and the people grow together. But later, everyone becomes the same because everything gets normalized and everyone starts living after the same schematics, the society is losing its "outbreakers" and "freaks". Total control of the government, everyone whos suspicious is being arrested, no demonstrations for peace on the streets anymore, what a sad world would that be? But I think Im getting of-topic, so I'll stop here, I just hope our children dont become that "transparent" if they grow up with all the media. And I hope we dont become that transparent.

[Blacksheepboy]

Oh gosh, I'm in pain over starting this thread.

[numgun]

Oh gosh, I'm in pain over starting this thread.

Theres always the alternative to choose another career besides people.

Not sure if it would suit you, but I personally am pretty as alone as I can get and enjoy it a lot. If I need someone to talk to, the internet is right there and I dont need to worry about anyone slowing me down or stopping me from enjoying my favorite activities and I have no restrictions in what I do.

Do enough self-analysis and you'll figure it all out and your mind will be at ease.



I hope.

[GhostRiderSwiss]

"Have a problem make a point, take it easy smoke a Joint" this might not works for everyone... but im very very successfull on it ^^

beside that i wont say too much about other things i readed, wont hurt anyones feeling.
But i also think like Stuffy does, the internet is / was and will be always and forever the wrong place for it.

Keep ur privacy!