Author Topic: A call to all Croatians  (Read 4524 times)

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Offline filip2322

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A call to all Croatians
« on: July 18, 2011, 09:21:24 pm »
All Croatians who are active in this or other Soldat forums please visit:

 http://crokani.freeforums.org/index.php  - the unofficial Croatian community
 #UCC - our IRC channel

We are all active players and would like to make it even larger to have fun together
and support the soldat community in general.
Or visit us for the lols.
All of us are also active in other soldat community's
Imperare sibi maximum imperium est

Offline Mangled*

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #1 on: July 21, 2011, 10:32:58 am »
Okay, I'll handle this guys.

Croatian is just a myth, it was just made up by people to explain the world around them when they didn't understand things that can be explained by modern science.

I know there are few Croatianists on this forum who would have you believe otherwise, but you'll likely end up arguing with them just as much as with the rest of us because each Croatianist's beliefs are really as individual as themselves because it's all in their head.

Don't take my word for it, just look at the world around you and then tell me is Croatian really an honest and accurate explanation of how everything has come to be?
"There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses." - Ezekiel 23:20

DarkCrusade

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #2 on: July 21, 2011, 11:11:13 am »
That was retarded and not funny

Offline Mangled*

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #3 on: July 21, 2011, 11:47:04 am »
That was retarded and not funny

I have an itchy croat.
"There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses." - Ezekiel 23:20

Offline smiluu

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #4 on: July 21, 2011, 12:03:00 pm »
That was retarded and not funny
I have an itchy croat.
Thats what you get for being retarded and not funny.

Offline croat1gamer

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #5 on: July 21, 2011, 12:39:40 pm »
I'm twelve and what is this?
Last year, I dreamt I was pissing at a restroom, but I missed the urinal and my penis exploded.

Offline n00bface

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #6 on: July 21, 2011, 01:26:54 pm »
I was in Zagreb yesterday! It was expensive and the bars close early! What's wrong with your country?? It's supposed to be Eastern Europe!

Offline croat1gamer

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #7 on: July 21, 2011, 05:11:38 pm »
Its f**king Zagreb.
The thing is that a big amount of people consider themselves west europeans, and that is the reason why its so crappy in there.

What to do in Croatia:
(thisll be something like a short "HOW TO GET DRUNK IN CROATIA" manual)

#1 Buy wine in a market with some friends, find a park/some space and get wasted in there.
Its either wine (pure or mixed with cola), some stronger alcohol (brandy/vodka/gin/etc.), or beer (not a fan of it, so no from me).

#2 Go to a feshta, which is essentially a festival. Repeat #1, but the drinks are often much more expensive, but it has music and stuff.

#3 You can go to a disco/bar, but that isnt that fun. Its expensive, some of them close early, easy to find lots of idiots and similar (careful with: underage girls, gypsies, guido-like guys).




Now, a bit back to #1:
Some of the most favoured drinks i can remember of atm:

#White wine* + cola
Dosage depends, some people do 50-50, some add just a bit of cola for the color.
Here (Kvarner/Dalmatia) its called a "lovranski".
More favoured on the coast.

*IMPORTANT: AVOID WINE CALLED "Ĺ jor Bepo". (Unless you want an knock-out / 'poisoning'.)

#Red wine + cola
Same as above. Dosage depends. Called "bambus".

*IMPORTANT: AVOID WINE CALLED "Ribar". (Unless you want an knock-out / 'poisoning'.)

#Any vodka combination. Theyre pretty much universal.
Juice, Red Bull, cola, something random.

#Rakija
Favoured Drunkard's™ drink. Carefully drink. Lots of variations, wouldnt hurt to distinct amongst them.

#Beer.
Its nothing special, mass produced, dont expect a Czech grade quality beer. Its also impoted from some other countries, so whatever. Again, nothing hi-q, but you can get wasted if you drink a lot.

#Other stuff. You know the drill.

Some more for #2:
Info on feshtas.
Music varies. It can range from folk (it says 'traditional') to rock/pop. Usually its somewhere in the middle. Lots of people, lots of alcohol, lots of everything.
They are happening in smaller places, almost never in bigger towns.
The police is usually fine, dont f**k with them and everything is fine. They might even drink with you.
Also, youll often find idiots who are searching for a fight. They are usually from the place where its happening so avoid any confrontation. Its easy to get zerg-rushed.

Cant say anything special about #3, as im not someone who favours that.
Last year, I dreamt I was pissing at a restroom, but I missed the urinal and my penis exploded.

Offline jrgp

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #8 on: July 21, 2011, 05:14:30 pm »
[interesting stuff]
I want to hear more about "(careful with: underage girls, gypsies, guido-like guys)."

There are other worlds than these

Offline PQ

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #9 on: July 21, 2011, 06:52:30 pm »
Its either wine (pure or mixed with cola), some stronger alcohol (brandy/vodka/gin/etc.), or beer (not a fan of it, so no from me).
Why don't you drink beer if you even mix your wine with cola?!?!! Only reason not to drink beer would be cause of it's low alcohol percentage that doesn't make you drunk but just makes you feel ill cause you've been drinking 3 liters in the past 3 hours..
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Offline croat1gamer

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #10 on: July 21, 2011, 07:11:27 pm »
Not sure exactly, but something is nagging me with its aftertaste around here. Its not that its intense or sth, but my tongue just wants to wash that out.

@ jrgp- Its actually simple:
Underage girls-
You can easily see some 14yo girls around, no matter when. Each time ive been to a place like that, it was proven.
"3 a.m.? Wanna make out?"

Gypsies-
Basically, the ******s of eastern europe.
*Blacks

Guido-like guys-
Basically its like:
this, this, this and occasionally this had gay sex and got a child out of that.
« Last Edit: July 21, 2011, 07:13:01 pm by croat1gamer »
Last year, I dreamt I was pissing at a restroom, but I missed the urinal and my penis exploded.

Offline filip2322

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #11 on: July 21, 2011, 07:35:22 pm »
Great explanation croat1gamer,and so sadly true :/
Nowadays its popular to get beaten to death or rape-kill someone,thats Croatia...

On topic: I guess there are no other Croatians around

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Offline VinceBros

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #12 on: July 21, 2011, 09:25:04 pm »
[interesting stuff]
Dude, you gotta make a unique topic about this or anyone else about his country, this shit is interesting, I think some semen flew out of my weenie, but I'm comfy with it.

Offline ds dude

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #13 on: July 22, 2011, 12:42:07 am »
I never realized that Croatians were so hardcore.
This signature was borked. Now it is not.

Offline KYnetiK

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #14 on: July 22, 2011, 02:41:50 am »
I never realised everyone elses junior high school was so benign.
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Offline jrgp

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #15 on: July 22, 2011, 05:17:15 am »
@ jrgp- Its actually simple:
Underage girls-
You can easily see some 14yo girls around, no matter when. Each time ive been to a place like that, it was proven.
"3 a.m.? Wanna make out?"

.....

If I was still 17 I could totally see taking a plane over there so I could make out with some young pussy, seeing as I can't get anything over here, no matter how hard I try :-/

However, I demand you make a full topic about the crazy hardcore shit in Croatia because it might give me a hard on.
There are other worlds than these

DarkCrusade

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #16 on: July 22, 2011, 05:26:14 am »
visit sowiet russia, were vagina comes to you!

Offline jrgp

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #17 on: July 22, 2011, 05:28:39 am »
visit sowiet russia, were vagina comes to you!

That's actually tempting.
There are other worlds than these

Offline croat1gamer

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #18 on: July 22, 2011, 05:56:11 am »
I never realized that Croatians were so hardcore.
Eastern Europeans who want to be West Europeans. Nothing special.
Last year, I dreamt I was pissing at a restroom, but I missed the urinal and my penis exploded.

Offline n00bface

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Re: A call to all Croatians
« Reply #19 on: July 22, 2011, 10:39:52 am »
Croatia isn't hardcore. I appreciate the information - I did that. But man, it's no Budapest. Bought cheap booze, had a house party, picked girls up, and went to that fancy place atop the hill with the expensive beer. Everything still closes early, the people don't party hard, and fuck, man, I get funny stares for drinking whisky in the morning. Even the waiters laughed at me. I think I need to go further east, like to Belgrade. Or maybe a trip to Kiev in a few weeks... I hear things are really fucked up there.