Okay, sometimes three days of depression is what it takes.
Let me explain: I'm sanguine by temperament, which technically means I'm very inventive and formulaic. Very well. So I plied my whit to this place and came up with the theories I did. Only just two days ago did I enter into what I call the "middle realm," which means I nailed on the last board to developing the last few temperament traits I was lacking. Now I'm developmentally at the center of the temperament quadrangle, though I am still natively a sanguine.
It goes like this: the four temperaments can be likened to this, king, warrior, magician, lover. I am the magician. I was talking to the warrior today, and BAM, it all came together. I knew it all already, but I really needed the chemistry. I may go back into depression, but now I know the truth.
Better than nothing.
Sorry for all the headaches and bullshit. I was developing through some very chaotic conclusions in my head, and the "demons" were rife. They still are, but I've got a sort of magic bullet.
Here's the conclusion:
But really... I think this sex is at the center of it. David DeAngelo, God bless his soul, says it drives the world. Fuck it, isn't God sort of sexual? It is said He is all the temperaments equally, so if I can get to the center through rigorous training, and I find that I find this intense motivation and courage from sex, and He is just there naturally, I think He would also appreciate it... haha, it sound ridiculous, but maybe it's true. It's suppose to be the highest form of love, because nothing else cuts it--seriously. Foreplay, teasing, seduction, and intercourse is really at the heart of life; it fucking CREATES life, and without it, creating life may be either impossible, or just really tedious.
