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Author Topic: Guide to Pubbing  (Read 5688 times)

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Offline LtKillroy

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Guide to Pubbing
« on: July 29, 2009, 09:25:59 pm »
This guide is for players with some experience but want to take their game to the next level.

First, before I get to the guide itself, I have to ask you the reader a couple of questions. First, can you type moderately quickly? Quickly is key, accuracy can be off if you are fast? Second, do you have some skills? Not as important as typing but still useful. Without these two, this guide is worthless to you.

Your Name
Your name is much more powerful than your weapon, so choose it wisely. I cannot tell you what your name should be, but I can help your along your way. The best names will tell your opponents how good you are right off the bat; reinforce this notion later. So your name should be something that is awesome, ninjas for example. After you get the core to your name, spice it up. Add things like Masta, Awesome, 1337, etc. to add to the name and make it your own. Finally, add useless symbols. Your going to be killing a lot, and your name should stick in their brain so they remember it. An example finished name is +++---Ninja Pwny---+++.
Your Gostek
After you get your name, you should get a gostek (what your dude looks like). If you feel like you are going to be a camper, all green is a must. Otherwise, use snazzy colors. Bright pink and lime are good combination. Red dreadlocks finish it off. Make your enemies fear that flying pink death machine.
Your Weapon
Before you even play a game, you should pick a weapon. The best one is the M79, just click and they explode. Nothing is more fun or effective. Next in line is the barret. Find a bush, pillar, or other scenery that hides you, and sit in it. When some poor guy walks up, blast him. Keep in mind you have to hold the trigger for a second because people where afraid of players like you owning them with instant shots from the sniper rifle. You will manage, however. The guns sorta drop off from here, but the Steyr, MP5, and Minimi are probably next in line. Just shoot at their general direction, off screen if you have to. Just put enough lead in the air for them to die or at least be hurt. You don't have to get a kill if your teammate does.
In the Game
Find some random game, its a pub so it doesn't really matter. What happens next depends on the situation. If someone kills you, they are cheating or lagging. If you followed the previous steps there is no way you could die, so let them know. Speed in typing is key here. Call them a noob or a hacker or a lagger. This is where the fun starts. To defend their honor, they will respond in kind. This is when you find and kill them as they type. Make sure to call them a noob when you kill them; they didn't even fight back! Keep this up and watch as your kills rack up. It doesn't matter if they insult you back so long as you keep killing.
Advanced Skills
If you have any, get friends involved. It makes these tactics both easier and more enjoyable. Even better is to get your own server and use majik admin commands to impose your will on the noobs in your server. Also, make sure you get a very dynamic IP address. You will need it.
L'audace, l'audace, toujours l'audace

Offline Blue-ninja

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #1 on: July 29, 2009, 09:56:59 pm »
Ok, let's get this straight...

My in-game name is Blue-ninja, and my gostek is made up of a blazin' blue pants and shirt, topped off with a fuschia-pink dreadlocks. I have a barrett, backed up by a knife. I also have a modest 100> ping in most servers, so I know when and who to complain to and about whenever I get killed; hacker, lagger, cheater, european servers, etc, etc.

...am I doing this right?

Oh, and I don't have a static IP address.

Offline -Vis-

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2009, 01:05:30 am »
Is this a joke? Need more poll options.


Offline Hair|Trigger

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #3 on: July 30, 2009, 03:18:17 am »
Great guide, I am a pretty experienced pubber myself.

Although you should probably also take into consideration your ping.  it is very important, like blue-ninja said, anything above 100 is ideal for pubs.

Player since late 2007

Offline ValiS

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #4 on: July 30, 2009, 04:45:43 am »
Is this a joke? Need more poll options.

How DARE you call this a joke? This is the holy relic of pubbing.
Actually I think theres one too many poll options, because everyone doubting the gratestness of this, doesnt deserve to be playing soldat.
I eat EFCs for breakfast (with a lot of ketchup ...)

Offline demoniac93

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #5 on: July 30, 2009, 11:38:09 am »
Lol, I have a magic ping of 150 and sometimes 250-8000. Does that make up for the lame gostek? (Black pants and skin, dark aqua dreads and shirt)
Oh and I added a cool shortcut to the nick "I4L" just to pimp it up, was that a good idea or should I change it to some random !!@%@#$%'s?
b&

Offline ValiS

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #6 on: July 30, 2009, 11:44:46 am »
You forgot to add that not olny is a nick like )=/%?#"="ยค"!#!"?`9  extremely cool, but it also makes muting you a real pain in the ass. Plus the added benefit that while they are doing it (takes a long time) you can pwn them several times! Just make sure you dont let your spawnkilling teammates steal your glory.
I eat EFCs for breakfast (with a lot of ketchup ...)

Offline Centurion

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #7 on: July 30, 2009, 02:09:29 pm »
That one mistake ruined the whole guide: It's Barrett not Barret

Offline LtKillroy

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #8 on: July 30, 2009, 02:14:34 pm »
I'm to lazy to type the extra t.
L'audace, l'audace, toujours l'audace

Offline ElGato

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #9 on: July 30, 2009, 02:25:43 pm »
Awful guide, even as a joke.
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Offline ~Niko~

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #10 on: July 30, 2009, 02:32:03 pm »
great, nice guide to turn soldat into a crap game

congratulations

Offline croat1gamer

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #11 on: August 04, 2009, 12:53:19 am »
You forgot the nade usage:
Always throw them in packs consisting least of 3 nades.

If you are in the enemy base, throw all your nades on the positions of the spawn points.
Spraying is an imperative.
Last year, I dreamt I was pissing at a restroom, but I missed the urinal and my penis exploded.

Offline L[0ne]R

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #12 on: August 04, 2009, 10:29:01 pm »
I can't believe I was so blind all this time. Thanks for showing us the true way of pubbing :O

Offline croat1gamer

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #13 on: August 05, 2009, 05:09:57 am »
Also, i forgot to add that it is an imperative to learn some polish words.
Last year, I dreamt I was pissing at a restroom, but I missed the urinal and my penis exploded.

Offline demoniac93

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #14 on: August 05, 2009, 12:44:18 pm »
Yeah I almost forgot, in soldat the direct meanings of the words may differ from the original, so:
Kurwa-bitch\whore (in pubs it means hi, or damn)
Suka-butch\slutt\etc
Zjeb-asshole\dickhead (in pubs it means too good)
Chuj-dick, testacles, fucko
The rest I forgot xd
b&

Offline L[0ne]R

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #15 on: August 05, 2009, 02:12:49 pm »
Also, i forgot to add that it is an imperative to learn some polish words.
Also spanish, mexican and czech.
« Last Edit: August 05, 2009, 02:14:58 pm by L[0ne]R »

Offline Shard

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #16 on: August 05, 2009, 02:36:23 pm »
English helps too.

This is a guide to being a true blue Major. I love it.

Offline Fujifabric

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #17 on: August 05, 2009, 02:43:24 pm »
« Last Edit: August 05, 2009, 02:45:02 pm by Fujifabric »

Offline croat1gamer

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #18 on: August 05, 2009, 02:44:25 pm »
Using a korean/japanese/chinese keyboard layout and downloading something with a torrent works also good.
Last year, I dreamt I was pissing at a restroom, but I missed the urinal and my penis exploded.

Offline p0ppin

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Re: Guide to Pubbing
« Reply #19 on: August 05, 2009, 03:05:53 pm »
DON'T FORGET THE CAPS LOCK
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